The great thing about traveling to for work is when you get to spend time in another country with people you don't normally get to spend time. The time difference, the stress of the unknown, and the lack of sleep is a powerful combination for creating some strong conversations.

One of my friends last night brought up the subject of leadership styles. Specifically, we were discussing how much help to provide people who are struggling. Do you provide them all the answers, and cover for their short-comings? Do you hold them accountable which invariably leads to some very upset and stressed individuals? Is there somewhere in the middle between direct involvement and letting them work things out for themselves?

We didn't necessary arrive at conclusions, and I don't think we were trying for any. It was more one of those casual conversations where you can see people working out what they think by talking and questioning.

To be in the weakest camp is to be in the strongest school.
- Heretics

For my own part, I think it very much depends on what is at stake in the endeavor. If very much is to be gained or the downside of failure isn't necessarily survivable, then stepping in with more direct involvement is probably warranted. On the other hand, as a matter of course, I tend to give people plenty of room to work things out themselves. Some might even say I give people too much wiggle room.

The funny thing about leadership is how different it can be than management. In some ways, managing people is much like solving an algebra equation. The variables are fairly limited and constrained so a solution is pretty easy to work towards regardless of how complicated it might at first appear. Contrast that with leadership which to my mind is more like doing calculus. You have to solve for multiple functions simultaneously and while the simple algebraic operations come into play, they are manipulated in much higher orders.

In any case, I do consider it a privilege to discuss these topics when approached. There is still much to learn and refine.

The good thing about having time on flights and locked in conference rooms without proper internet access, is that I get a chance to work on all my backlog of projects.

Yesterday I went through a host of old pictures and got them properly processed and posted. You can find them in all the usual places.

Also, I've been having some interesting conversations with my work counterpart as we've been able to focus without distractions on the tasks at hand.

Last thing for today is that my baby sister needs some prayer. Lift it up, y'all.

In the workplace, the subject of religion is generally considered to be taboo. But when a work friend is struggling, is it wrong to comment that we will pray on their behalf? I would submit that if you have insight into their personal faith system it is not wrong. However to assume when you have no understanding is probably not wise.

If like myself you find yourself praying often for others even in circumstances where you may never see the outcome, how do persevere not being privy to the answers to those prayers? For me, it is one of the great mysteries that we can pray at all. Anticipating answers is way above my personal pay grade from the start.

In my study of prayer a central theme emerged to quell my indecision in such matters. The consensus would appear that there are types of prayers that are always answered, and three specific types of prayers that are always answered with "Yes". Thomas Aquinas took this further and described four conditions under which any prayer would be answered affirmatively. In his writing you find these conditions to be:

1. Concerning Salvation
2. Personal
3. Pious
4. Persevering

While the aspects of such prayers may be contested, the logic appears sound. After all, the nature of faith is personal therefore surely you can meddle successfully only in your own relationship. When you approach in submissive or devout mindset you are thinking of the greater good not personal gain which also seems needful. Anything truly needed is worth asking for consistently. So these all make sense.

When you do a little more research you find a variety of other writers who argue that there are simply types of prayers that are always answered. Salvation, confession, and wisdom seem to be the common agreed to classifications.

As I examine their words, I find the overlap to be significant and gap to be mostly immaterial. In all cases, salvation is the prevalent theme. Those things which aid or guide or influence that salvation and the walking in righteous that must follow salvation, those things also are included.

So how then shall we pray? Without ceasing.

So for what then shall we pray? His Will.

Back in Mumbai again. Lots of work to do and it is easy to do nothing but work here.

Before I left California, I went out with my buddy. It was great to watch him work the room. In this episode he spent 40 minutes chatting up a duet. Inspirational!

After the trip over here, we immediately got down to business under the watchful eyes of management.

Some of us just read the paper.

I missed several days of posting on the blog. But I have written some new topics so check 'em out when you get a chance.

Large projects are very different from small projects. Large team dynamics work on fundamentally different rules than small team dynamics. This isn't something that would be readily apparent or appreciated in its fullness unless and until you have slogged through them both.

My recent endeavors allow me great insight into the working mindset of a variety of people around me. It is a great joy for me, that even after all this time, I still am able to find refinements in my own thinking just from watching the mental meanderings of others. It is a great sadness that reverse is so infrequently true. Alas my communication skills are just inept. Hence the blog.

As I compare and contrast the endpoints we each inevitably reach as we drag our thoughts to their logical conclusion, I am reminded of the how and why I metaphorically strive to drink the Juice of Sapho during each and every conversation. If the thoughts do not acquire speed, the sheer number of available pathways looms large and grows faster causing us invariably to become overwhelmed. It is only when thoughts acquire speed that we can indeed make progress. Much like any orbital mechanics problem, if you want to go faster, you have to slow down.

I've written often of the need for simplicity and generalization as a means to efficiency. Efficiency is often used interchangeably with speed as speed is often a side-effect or result of efficiency. When I speak of generalization (which leads to simplicity, which leads to efficiency) you will often find it described in terms of elegance. And I am not the only one who strives as such:

When I am working on a problem I never think about beauty. I only think about how to solve the problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong.
-- Richard Buckminster Fuller

While we often search for aids that allow us to go faster, such as the Juice of Sapho, we often forget that the most direct way to increase our speed, is simply to go slower.

When you've been through a divorce and come out the other side, if such a thing can even be said, how do you handle the questions from others about marriage?

The other day at lunch one of my friends who is happily married was discussing the upcoming family holiday in which he would be spending time with relatives. I will never forget his illustration about marriage. He said that marriage is like being in a cold pool and pretending the water is fine so that you can watch your friends jump in and see the look on their faces. I'm not saying he's right, but I understand.

There goes somebody's miracle
Walking down the street
There goes some other fairy tale
I wish it could happen to me

But I look at myself Wonderin' if i'm just too weak
To have such faith in myself

-- Somebody's Miracle by Liz Phair

A few nights ago, a young person and I were discussing his future relationship milestones over some cocktails. His questions were innocent enough and I was happy to answer, but I struggled with providing an objective view without being too objective (if you know what I mean). How can you give a clear picture when you know that whatever you say is going to be skewed because of the taint you have surrounding you? Do you just punt? Decline? Provide a list of caveats and clauses?

Ultimately, I just want my friends to be happy. And for many of them a marriage is the best way to find that and I encourage them towards that end. When you know they aren't ready for it, how do you communicate that without it being wrapped up in your own perceived issues with marriage? In my heart, I don't really think I have issues with marriage as a concept. Poor choices, and a negative experience by one should not reflect on the whole and I'm usually pretty good at separating them. But there is nothing to say that the person listening realizes I am capable of speaking fairly. They don't always know that I truly have their best interests at heart and when I give input it is using my perception of their value system and preferences. My own tastes don't really factor into the discussion.

Just to be clear, I don't subscribe to the rest of that Liz Phair song. I just like miracles.

Do you ever have the same conversation repeat itself with more than one person in just a very short span of time? It recently happened to me.

We were discussing skills that one might need to be a better consultant. Please ignore for now the sweeping generalization that is "consultant". In reality, the different people I conversed with are from different walks of life, attempting to be good at very different things. I am generalizing because the conversations were so very similar in context if not content.

The gist of the context was how important being able to take in a breadth of information, efficiently identify what is important, organize your thoughts succinctly about that information, and articulate a response quickly. For almost any form of knowledge-based service, this is a crucial skill. Whether you are providing technology leadership about a specific solution, personal leadership about a career, or creative leadership as part of sales, the patterns are similar. Admittedly I only came to this after the fact, once the conversations had transpired.

In each case, we were discussing how one gets better at that process. Each of them used different language to describe their process, but each provided the same answer: practice. When we dove into what the process looked like for the purposes of identifying how one might go about practicing the fundamentals, the same pattern emerged. Again, I didn't realize they were the same during the conversations only in retrospect.

As we discussed what are the fundamentals that one should practice, again the same concept came out: writing. Writing is widely understood to be one of the best means for helping you practice organizing your thoughts. The ability to make thoughts concrete so they can moved around, weighed, and compared is only possible by writing them down. Almost every form of self-help, get-better, be-the-best scheme out there has a component of writing. But I have found that writing by itself is not enough.

For Practice to be Effective it should be:
1. Written.
2. Relevant.
3. Read.
The more feedback the better. The more public, the more feedback.

If you are going to write there are two additional factors that should be considered. The first is relevance. Why put time into something that isn't interesting to you? It needs to be something you can be passionate about or you won't stick with it. You won't really put in the energy if you don't care about the subject you write about. I have found that you can truly write about any subject that matters as long as it is relevant in your thoughts.

The second factor is that it must be read. For some people this only means that they themselves must be willing to come back after some significant time has passed and read their words. If no more than that is done I believe some benefit can be gained. In fact, I feel that only once it is read is any significant benefit to be gained from the writing.

If at all possible though, the greatest benefit is by sharing your words. Share them someone close if that is all you dare, share them with the world if you can. The feedback to be garnered is where the real learning comes in to play. If you recognize that your writing is the practice for your thoughts, then you need the feedback to know how to get better.

Before you think I am only talking about blogging or something, let me caution that there are many ways that aren't as obvious as a blog to engage in writing and get feedback. You can join a user community and participate in the forum posts, you write letters to the editor of your paper. You can read other blogs and post comments. There are dozens of opportunities to find subject matter that is relevant to you, write about it, and have it be read. Do you have email communities at your work? Read and respond! Not into public displays of writing (PDW)? Keep a journal and have your friends, advisors, therapist, read it over.

If you want to learn to think fast and articulate well, practice your writing. You can even start now, write me a comment. ;-)

The headline for this post is taken from a song by The Weepies. A most excellent duet, it is not uncommon to find their music providing the soundtrack for my thoughts.

This weekend, friends of mine are graduating from college. Another friend of mine just broke up with his long-time fiancé. I met new friends in the evening and spoke of fascinating endeavors and the future. My work continued late into the night, and ended only partially resolved. Still the world spins.

What do you grab onto when the sphere shifts beneath you to rapidly to follow? When the whirlwind catches you in its clutches, where do you look for grounding?

Even as a man of faith, it can be neigh futile to see the pattern in the shifting sands. Although reading through His Word works wonders for my sense of clarity. Still the world spins.

If I was only better at offering support. If only the proper words to say flowed more freely from my lips. If somehow I could succor those suffering. If only my accolades were more meaningful, my pride more impactful. If only I could graciously rejoice and mourn at turns without this vertigo.

Still the world spins.

One of my good friends is struggling with something in his life. It is one of those Really Big Scary things that we all hope we never have to come face to face with. As I watch how smoothly he navigates day by day I can't help but question how I would manage when faced with such challenges. In contrast, what I have on my plate is just laughable. In any case, this song often echoes my feelings when it seems I am behind in the race.

The rain falls on the righteous and the wicked
Mine is not to reason why this is
In this I rest in this I find my refuge
That my thoughts and ways are not His
I spend my life on looking up the answers
It’s rare that I can’t find a reason why
But reasons fail at children without mothers
His plan is more than I can know

Have you ever held in doubt
What this life is all about
Have you questioned all these things
that seem important to us
Do you really wanna know
Or are you a little scared
You’re afraid that God is not really
exactly what you’d have Him be
What should I hold to and what should I do
How do I know if anything’s true
I’m somewhere in-between Canaan and Egypt
A place called the wilderness

I’m not one who always trusts their feelings
I don’t believe in what you’d call blind faith
But faith that you can do all that you promised
And you said it all works for good
It’s safe to say I don’t see the big picture
I can’t see the forest for the trees
And if five hundred lives
Were mine to get to know you
All could be spent on just this

God do you really understand
What it’s like to be a man
Have You ever felt the weight of
loving all the things you Hate
Have You struggled have you worried
How can You sympathize
I have spoken too soon
Put my hand over my mouth
I can’t contend with You
Your ways are so much higher
And we pass through the fire that
Christ endured before us
When You were in the wilderness
-- Wilderness by OC Supertones

How are you doing?

Can I help?